P.S. It Didn’t Fix Me I thought when I reunited with my first mom and first family it would fix me. I thought it would work like a sealant on all the cracks in my heart and all the cracks I wore on the surface. It didn’t fix me. It broke me open even wider. I’m … Continue reading P.S. It Didn’t Fix Me
Life has no rule book, adoption reunion is no exception. Each reunion is unique and complex. I dreamed of reunion even before he was born, that one day he would find me and we would live happily ever after. I would make him proud and he would fall right into place where he belongs as … Continue reading P.S. YOU ARE COMPLICATED
I am in an 8-year reunion with my son from a closed adoption. I have thought of him every single day of his life. I grieve what we lost and some of the heartbreaking situations he has had to maneuver to be in a reunion with his first family. I spent the first 5 years … Continue reading P.S. Let’s Tell the Whole Story
“It’s a girl!” The drug fog had cleared enough for me to hear the doctor say that and open my eyes. I could clearly see him holding her upside down by her ankles. She was bluish, and immediately her color changed as she gasped her first breaths and made her voice known to the world … Continue reading P.S. I’m Your Daughter
P.S. I have a full-blooded brother!!! I have a full-blooded brother!!! I have a full-blooded brother!!! I have a full-blooded brother!!! Forgive me for repeating myself, but... I have a full-blooded brother! And it is taboo to speak of him. I can never speak to my family about him. I have tried. It does not … Continue reading P.S. I Have a Full-Blooded Brother!!!
Two families. Two lives. Not fully belonging to either. The mother who has prayed for me since the day I arrived. The mother who was there through every milestone, loving me fiercely. The mother who has been grandmother to my children. The mother who never felt ownership, but loved me like I was hers. The mother … Continue reading P.S. The Place in Between
P.S. I Found Her... I found my mother on Easter Sunday. I woke feeling weary from the toll the search had taken. I told the kids, “I’m going to find my mother today.” I sat down and stared at my Ancestry tree. Four hours later, after combing through every descendant of my great, great, great … Continue reading P.S. I Found Her